halfgodsgotswag:

heyfunniest:

“Mom, Dad, I’m gay.”
“Ok… so do you want pizza for dinner or just McDonalds?” 

FEATURED AT HEYFUNNIEST. FOLLOW NOW!

“Mom….I’m…”
“Gay. Yeah.”
“You knew?”
“I ship you and your best friend.”
“Ship?”
“I ship it.”
“Well…We’re dating. Is it fine?”
“Does he like reading?”
“Yeah. He read all those old books you liked when you were a kid. You know that series about those Greek god kids and wizards and that boy who bakes a lot and that-“
“You have my permission to marry him. Now let’s go to Disneyland.” 

199406 Notes   imnotheretojudgeSource   godtieroswinReblogged  

wowfunniestposts:

FOLLOW Wow Funniest Posts

38019 Notes   dabaddestbitchSource   tumblegagsReblogged  

draconommingshark:

whiterabbit13:

notreallyjake:

cheapb0uquet:

lolahlovesit:

punk-hen:

lexi-aka-ls:

Next time I fly I want a gay flight attendant. They seem fun.

Omfg. QUINJA. THAT LAST LINE IS SO YOU.

YES OMG

ooooh

THRAY UP, BITCH. all the awards to this fabulous man.

Ohmygod I love!

I would have hugged him.

99199 Notes   marinarasauce182Source   felicia-dayumReblogged  

r4don:

everyone needs to look up to her, okay?

84 Notes   hiidylanReblogged  

draconommingshark:

Might have reblogged this already.

Don’t care.

58869 Notes   grammatizat0rSource   felicia-dayumReblogged  

newdisaster:

iloveeveryoneinthisbar:

Whether you’re gay, straight, purple, orange, dinosaur, I don’t care.

 reblogged for the dino :D

49860 Notes   everettcrissSource   felicia-dayumReblogged  

lookatyourlifelookatyourdarrens:

Because we all have the right to an “Happly Ever After” with the person we love.

cuteee.

8334 Notes   puersolitariusSource   sleazystyles-deactivated2012101Reblogged  

unwindher:

Sorry to frighten the fuck out of my new followers.

THIS^ is love. I was dying, due to pcp pneumonia and acute respiratory failure/distress.  I lost over 150lbs, one of my lungs collapsed and will never re inflate, I had chest tubes, multiple IV’s, I was on a ventilator, had a tracheostomy, had to re-learn how to walk, talk, eat and breathe on my own, all over again. My husband, was there for me EVERY. FUCKING. DAY. The amazing doctors and nurses at KU Medical Center ALL commented on how amazingly dedicated my husband was. How few husbands show such tenderness and love. I would have died, had he not been there to keep me going.

I have a man who wiped my ass for me because I messed myself in my hospital bed.

Now, tell me that we are going to ruin the sanctity of marriage and I will bust your fucking teeth out.

<3

35064 Notes   fandomismsReblogged